Tuesday, 26 August 2014

Stop stressing and look at the pretties...

I have had anxiety and bouts of depression since I was a preteen, which I think is partly to blame for my near-lifelong nail biting habit. I blame my nail biting for my obsession with nail polish - an obsession that has been quietly growing for the past few years...

My obsession with nail polishes began almost a decade ago; I'd managed to stop myself from biting my nails and picking my cuticles for a few weeks longer then my past attempts, so my mum talked me into getting my ragged nails filed into a nicer shape when we where in a store (Debenhams) which had a nail bar to 'celebrate' this acheivement.

The nail bar was a Nails INC one and I loved the way that the pretty polish (it was the shade Pall Mall - still a firm favourite polish of mine) wore on me - it lasted three or four days before it began to chip, and since I'd only been using a self-powered wheelchair for a year or so at the time, I was gobsmacked  that it lasted so well - I thought pretty polishes and pampering nail bar visits would only be wasted on me, but this experience opened a door in my mind; I could be 'girlie' if I wanted to be.

Shortly after my visit to the nail bar I relapsed into nail biting and, buying something that I could only use if I made myself stop the nail biting, I bought one of the Nail INC four piece sets to keep in my line of sight at home - it was a autumn trends one which contained all crème shades; Motcomb Street (navy), Chester Square (oxblood), Mount Street (chocolate), and Black taxi (black). This act of dangling a carrot in front of myself has stuck with me over the years, so whenever I feel the urge to bite I get another new polish to leave in my line of sight to discourage any nibbling.

It may seem silly to some people, but łooking through my polish collection when I'm feeling low or unconfident can be enough to remind myself that I CAN DO IT.

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